They were both in their late 30s and knew what they wanted out of life, so he was contemplating popping the question.
But, as he stated in the note, with the rate of divorce being so high he was questioning his ability to detect whether or not he was making the right decision.
My priest told me to go for it; my spiritual director said I was ready; I had always been told it was a perfect fit for me. If you are wondering whether I mean dating or priesthood, the answer is: yes.
I was painfully shy and always fighting feelings of inadequacy, and was so afraid to try either one, to step outside my comfort zone.
Religious life may be more of an unknown, but most communities offer “come and see” opportunities, as well as live-in experiences and service opportunities that may lift some of the mystery of what life in a community of vowed religious might be like.
Experiences of dating, of really liking or loving someone, are important benefits to bring to discernment, and are part of healthy relational maturity.
Personally, I think there are many indicators to help you know if you are with the right person and the way you feel about someone is certainly one of them. Therein lies the beauty of marriage; learning to love each other even more when those feelings aren’t present.
Usually, when you are with “the one” you feel a strong, familiar, peaceful connection to him/her in addition to the romance and excitement. But, if feelings are not the proper gauge, what is? An interesting trend has emerged in the last 15 years or so that underscores this desire among single people to feel as confident as possible about their chosen partner, and that trend is all about couples who are not yet engaged but are attending pre-cana classes.
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From the very beginnings of our relationship, she was well aware of the fact that I was still uncertain where God was calling me, and that the priesthood was still very much a path I was considering. Entering the seminary, while certainly a huge step not to be undertaken lightly, is not a lifelong commitment.
But still, I found myself wondering: should I be doing this? In fact, seminary formation itself is designed as an extended, focused discernment process in addition to formation.
You may have lived closely within a marriage (your family), and probably have observed many marriages in your life.
And chances are you have been living the single life for at least some of your adult life.