One minute you're high on the warmth of their attention, the next minute you're frozen out and left wondering what happened. Whether you call it push/pull, on/off, or hot and cold, the end result is the same. Whether done consciously or unconsciously, this type of behavior activates longing and pursuit. If we don't understand the game of hot and cold, we can find ourselves pulled into a drama of confusion. Understanding this type of behavior is crucial even for those of you committed to not playing games. Behavioral extremes indicate a power play is being employed. Once we have the ability to see hot and cold for what it is, we're less likely to suffer its negative effects. Mind games and relationships will always go hand in hand.
But new research from Binghamton University says you're being too self-centered and aggressive.The same questions continually pop up in the forums, and in coaching sessions. What is the proper etiquette when it comes to letting a man know I am interested? To flirt or not to flirt To make matters worse there are the dating games. Dating Games Men Play The first game men play is often called the ‘three day rule’.How do I ask if s/he dates one person at a time, or several? This varies in time and structure, but it generally follows the same pattern. It's long been the rule that when dating someone whose behavior is marked by hot and cold reactivity, you're standing on shaky ground.This is the core thinking of the partner who initiates hot/cold, and serves as their safety net to vulnerability. Because relationship uncertainty makes human beings yearn for stability.